The entire pilgrimage really was, for me, one filled with grace and, surprisingly, immense joy. I found myself unsure of what to expect going into it, though I was open to receiving whatever God intended. I was conscious that originally it was supposed to be the Canonisation of Blessed Carlo Acutis. He is a Blessed that I feel very close to, so naturally I was so excited! I was also looking forward to seeing Pope Francis again, and felt sure that the atmosphere in Italy would be similar to that of World Youth Day. It would be joyful and electrifying!
Therefore as we went into our trip, now preparing for a very different moment in history, the burial of Papa Francesco, I wasn’t really sure how I’d feel. Would Rome, myself or my fellow pilgrims feel solemn and sad constantly? This would contrast the expectation of joy I’d initially imagined to feel on the pilgrimage before it all changed. However, the funeral was such a celebration of Pope Francis, and of all the young pilgrims, that the few days I had in Rome were wonderful! Breaking into song and smiles, and expressing great happiness… it was contagious. The atmosphere was that of hope, a real testament to that being our Jubilee Year’s theme.
I found praying a novena each day to Blessed Carlo with some of my fellow pilgrims each day to be beautiful. We all still felt so close to him though it was not his Canonisation, and I’m sure he was a catalyst to our joy. Even in some of the more difficult times of the pilgrimage, there were such graces for us too.
After the funeral we were supposed to go through the Holy Doors to receive a plenary indulgence, which would have been very profound for us. However after queuing for quite a while, we realised we would not get into St Peter’s Basilica before closing time. We were all quite tired, and disappointed. We did not understand why God did not intend for us to receive the indulgence. With such a busy schedule for the next few days, we knew we were very unlikely to be able to go back so it was hard. However the next day, by God’s grace we ended up being allowed to go! We did not have to queue and lots of people intervened to make sure that we got to receive our plenary indulgence! It was such a beautiful reminder to all of us that God’s will and plan for us is always bigger than we think and he provides so much more than we ask! If we hadn’t experienced the disappointment the day before, the excitement and grace of the following morning wouldn’t have happened.
It was this, along with the community and camaraderie of the pilgrimage that filled me with such peace and stood out. It was such a unique experience, and one I am extremely blessed to have been a part of. I realised on the pilgrimage too, that though I did not get to see Pope Francis physically again, he was close to us all spiritually. He was in our hearts and prayers and so still at the heart of the experience for me.